What did Gandhi say when he broke his fast?
It has bean a long time…
we need more jokes in this section! 
What do you say to an onion who buys you beer at the bar all night long?
You probably shay, “Thanx shallot!” – 
– " Have you heard of Murphy’s law? "
– " Yeah! What is it? "
– " It means when something can go wrong, it probably will go wrong. "
– " Oh, okay. Have you heard of Cole’s law? "
– " No, what’s that? "
– " It’s thinly sliced cabbage. "
A weasel walks into a bar.
The bartender says, “Wow, I’ve never served a weasel before. What can I get you?”
“Pop,” goes the weasel, “and make it a Zevia please.”
( Weasels prefer to drink Zevia. Check out: zevia.com )
A doctor and an engineer loved the same woman. The doctor used to give this woman a rose every day. The engineer used to give her an apple every day.
One day, after she had just received another apple, the confused woman looked at the engineer and said, " Giving a rose to a woman is a very romantic thing to do." Then she asked, “Why do you give me an apple every day?”
The engineer answered, “Because an apple a day keeps the doctor away.”